Upset

News: Activists smash up cinema after Bollywood breaks lesbian taboo.

I am outraged. I cannot understand why no person in India has responded, they should be out in the streets burning theaters, attacking multinationals and any other structure that does not resemble a Jhoppad patti. Just how could you excuse a filmmaker making a lesbian move, that too most probably a crappy one? Its outright offense to “Indian culture”. How can Karan Razdan make a movie about lesbians, when he cannot even be one (unless of-course he decides to to go under the surgical knife). I protest vehemently.

The Morality of Indian cinema has been on a decline over a period of time. We used to have a golden time, when we used to see two flowers in the screen as soon as in the movie, the hero and the heroine came together. During that time movies also made sure that they maintained the high standards of morality. They used to show atleast one song where Silk Smitha, Disco Shanti or some other b(h)eavyweight scantily clad dancing to some “uncultured” music. Then the audience could see for themselves, how culturally right the movie was compared to that song, which represented evil. How very culturally correct depiction of morality. From that to this is an outright display of moral denigration. Woe unto the makers of “Girlfriend” movie. May they go to netherworlds, and become gay and find only scantily clad belles all around them.

Though I was in UK, I also wanted to play a part in all these exciting and exalted cultured activities by shivsena activists. The best way to display my protest was by pelting some stones at the nearest theatre. I drove from my home to the theatre thinking that I will find some stones on the way by side of road. But I believe the Intelligence agencies here got a scent of my intentions many years ago, and made it impossible to find a stone in the road, footpath or the green patch that began from the end of the footpath. Frustrated i reached the theatre without stones, where I inquired with security as where to get the stones. He told me that the nearest place I can get stones is in a B&Q or Homebase store, who sold them in sacks starting from ?5 (Rs.400). Damn, I cannot even protest against an offense to Indian Culture properly. I am in a country where you have to buy even stones and soil from the superstores.

But I am thankful that Shivsena and others like minded party activists are taking corrective measures to counter the cultural imbalance infecting Indian cinema. I wish they could come to power as only they can prove that Kamasutra was written by some invader and imposed upon us and make us realize that the book never belonged to our culture. The sculptures at Ajanta and Ellora were also brought in by marauders coming from afghanistan and assembled in India. This is all a conspiracy, and these activists can prove that, by breaking theatres and buring books.

I am thinking that Shivsena and others should have branches all over the world. Eventhough AL-Keeda group operates underground, for shivsena there is no need to do that. They are afterall protecting the culture and are not into taking lives, just re-establishing the culture of the world as it should be. Maybe they can open a branch in china, where the western immoral people are culturally corrupting the panda’s by showing them x rated movies [yes, you can click the link safely from office]. Talk about degradation of our culture and westernisation of society.

One thought on “Upset”

  1. HAHAHAHAHAHA! Funny……But u can’t beat this…..when u see quotes on the news channels like “Lesbianism is not in Indian culture, all are imports from the west”………heeeeeeeee! I just crack up!

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